Surrender
Dear God, sometimes i find surrender is more the opposite of what i imagined it to be. the more selfish possessions/ambitions/wants You rip out of my heart the harder and more painful it becomes to see them go. i thought it would be easier to surrender to Your will as i got older, because i would see Your hand at work in my life in an area that You took - i would realize how "it" was now so much better in Your hands than it ever was in mine and the fruit that now blossomed from a branch that was dead - i would understand more of the freedom of loss of control and the sweet peace of trusting in my Lord. now don't get me wrong - i have! i have seen this in my life over and over again. but the longer i hold onto a desire, the harder it becomes for You to take this desire from me, the more i fight to keep it in my soul, and the more painful when You, at times, break my hand to release the grip that holds tight to this desire of my heart and flesh. You've asked for a lot...